How To Be A Happy Mother
“Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her. Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all. Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised.” (Prov 31:28-30)
Mother’s Day celebrates motherhood and appropriately comes every year at this time. The Bible honors mothers, and holds the key to happiness for the dearest among us. Below are God-given parameters for young women and those close to them – which would be all of us!
Start with the right father. Women of the world sometimes behave as if the father of their child does not matter so much, as if “single-parenting” is the way to go.
Please consider that there are worthy examples of masculinity out there: men who love their wives enough to give themselves for them (Eph 5:25); men who gladly work and provide for mothers and their children during the crucial developmental years (1 Tim 5:8); men who lend their strength as males to the whole family; men who provide spiritual purity and leadership for the family. Can you respect such a man?
A woman who begins motherhood outside of marriage or who is separated from her husband falls into many difficulties. A split family has two households to keep up, lawyer bills to pay, visitation expenses, and other grievous complications.
Look about you and you’ll see women in hardship, with children who are subjected to want and disadvantage. Hollywood models and tax-payer dollars cannot solve these problems.
So, pick your man carefully, and make your marriage permanent as the first step in family-building. (Mt 19:3-9) Cutting edge ladies might today pick the genes of their children from sperm banks (or sperm donors), as if they were breeding cattle. We are talking about human beings here! Find a partner who knows the meaning of love, devotion, tenderness, and faithfulness.
Suppress any whim or fancy which would jeopardize your child’s welfare. Abortion is the extreme example of discarding an inconvenient child, but there are many ways to neglect children before one reaches the point of such an extreme. You probably know that alcohol, tobacco, and other drugs are bad for unborn children. These vices are bad for children who have been born into infancy or toddlerhood, too.
When schools teach classes to prevent young parents from “shaking” their infant children who cry, might one conclude that basic parenting is neglected in the homes? Mothers are the best to teach coping and nurturing skills to young mothers. (Tit 2:3-5) And, woe to the world when there are no fathers around to teach the teen boys! (Heb 12:5-11)
I’m embarrassed to have to put into words such elementary precepts as this point, but mothers should be women. Yes, “house husbands” and “stay-at-home dads” have made their way into the public vocabulary, but thinking in such terms is harmful to children because of the perversity of swapping roles. Women are naturally “wired” and suited for the tender upbringing of children.
If the woman is capable of bringing home a bigger pay check than the man, the family decision will be between better money or better upbringing for the children. The two are not necessarily the same, you know. Here is a decision which should have been made before the children were born, the kind of “planned parenthood” the scripture stresses. (Prov 31:26-27; 1 Tim 5:14)
Further, this observation sheds light on the unwise practice of leaving children with strangers during their developmental years. The children will not always be small, so parents must take advantage of these years of opportunity.
The great social experiments of America continue, and such extreme issues as same-sex marriage, abortion, and cohabitation are but harbingers of many lesser misguided mothering practices which might be popularly accepted, but nevertheless are not the best for children. Let the man earn a living for the whole family, and let the mother attend to the immediate needs of the little ones. Discarding tradition might sometimes be wise, but tampering with the roles of the sexes is foolhardy.
Devote your life to God. You might be counseled to “send your kids to church,” or perhaps even to “take your kids to church,” which is much better. However, your children will quickly detect if you have a shallow and academic interest in your child’s moral training as opposed to a deep interest in doing God’s will. They will be much more likely to do as you do than to do as you say. Show them how to sincerely pray, to faithfully attend worship services and Bible classes, to turn your back on fallacious preaching, and to say no to temptation. Study, discipline, and regularity will be required, but the rewards will be multiple, coupled with the hope of eternal life for you and your precious little ones.
“But if our gospel be hid, it is hid to them that are lost….” (2 Cor 4:3)
There is a reason Jesus called God “Our Father which art in Heaven....” All of the desirable virtues have their beginning with Him – certainly not from the happenstance of natural selection! Proper parenting skills, and happiness, will begin with God.
Sometimes mothers learn the above lessons after they have immersed themselves into less prudent situations. Turning to God and correcting as many mistakes as possible is still the best choice for themselves and for their children. Mercy, self-sacrifice, humility, and perseverance compose the fabric of motherhood. These virtues are taught – not at the honky tonks or on the sit-coms – but in the Bible. It is never too late to learn them and put them into practice.
"Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. “Honor your father and mother,” which is the first commandment with promise:" (Eph 6:1-2)